This Morning

I cried myself to awake today
I could hear it as I broke my way
through morning’s surface
from deep below
mourning’s termless grief
I took it slow
as I’ve learned to do
sat up gradually
swivelled around
on the edge
of the bed
placed feet on ground
grew accustomed
to the familiar sounds
of a brand new day
an Eastern Koel's song
heralded the sun's first ray
as I blinked away
the last dregs of that dream
I seem to remember
someone wrote on a card
“take comfort in memories”
so tomorrow morning I will not weep
and instead I’ll smile myself to sleep

Table For Two

It’s habitual
this ritual
of taking out two plates
and then realising too late
after placing them on the bench
that you’re only cooking for one
now
I ask you
where’s the fun
in that

you put one back
in the cupboard

Looking Up

Lately I’ve been looking up at clouds
a little more than ever before
Is it just me
or do they seem
slightly closer?
I can see them from inside this train
I know they once held rain
in their hands
and where it lands
they care not
This train is packed tight with people
who have been soaked to the bone
just trying to get home
without one more drop falling
on their already saturated selves
Some thought life was a gift
to keep
but some have had enough
and want to give it away
call it quits
call it a day
“I’m over it” they say, while under
the weight of it all
and waiting for it all
to lift
But all is not lost
The lady two seats in front
says she delivers catalogues to letterboxes
on the weekend
so she can send
money to a child in Africa
I should feel inadequate
I decide to feel inspired
She looks tired
and I swear to God
I will try to ask for his help less
I confess
right here on this train
to all manner of sins and failings
I want to not make bargains
anymore
I recall
a conversation where we both said
we didn’t wish to be dead
but if given the choice
we would have chosen not to be born
It seemed like such a sad thing
to admit to at the time
but now I’m fine with feeling that way
because that’s not to say
I’m not making the most of every day
Oh no
I’m smelling roses like no one’s business
I’m laughing fit to burst
I’m fighting so hard to stop fearing the worst
about what's in store
things are looking up
like I do at the clouds
a little more than ever before

2am

See those three girls in the back seat
It’s 2am and they need some sleep
They’re being driven home along the freeway
Lights piercing the dark where there once was day
The first rests her head on the window of the car
The second rests her head on the first’s shoulder
The third rests her head on the shoulder of the second
The second feels blessed before sleep beckons