To Whom It Always Concerns

To Whom It Always Concerns,

Paper is precious in these parts
so this is the last
I will write to you.

There is more to my love than you know
Which is
I found all that I wanted
which was
just simply, you
use your heart as a palette
and people are your paint
I see you as an eager artist liberally and endearingly
stroking and splashing your attention around in broad sweeps and gestures
and brushing, aside to this
all of us want to be the only colour on your canvas
Just you and them alone
The makings of a duotone
(or perhaps a diptych?)
They imagine that they could fit into a frame with you
I did it to
I see now I was just a small part of your picture
I see now we all bear your signature
at the bottom right hand corner
of our hearts.

Signed,

The One No Longer Concerned

Layer Upon Layer

My new skin
only stings
when the shower spray needles hit the spot
that I just cannot
quite put my finger on
I said to the Doc
“there’s a stabbing pain
like a knife in my back”
and quick as a flash
he burnt that sucker off
But
turns out
I pointed to the wrong damn spot
Now I’m going
to have to be growing
some more
when I’ve only just worn in
this new layer of skin
I better begin
at the back
It will be a patch
on the original

Dirty Dishes Sink Shuffle

I’m not listening to any love songs tonight
Not a single, solitary one
No love unrequited, nor passion uninvited
Or love that is over and done
I’ve got the iPod docking station up real loud tonight
and I don’t want no songs about hearts
No two souls united, nor love at first sighted
Or love is the whole of two parts
I’m singing at the top of my lungs tonight
but nothing with lyrics on amore
No moon hitting your eye, nor big pizza pie
Or love that is described in such cliché
I’m not interested in any love songs tonight
I’m skipping tracks as I dance round the sink
No love done me wrong, nor pure, true and strong
Man, there are more songs about love than you think

Ode To A Mysterious Bruise

Oh, mysterious bruise
how you do confuse
I don’t recall
doing anything at all
to cause a haematoma
I didn’t fall over
or walk into a chair
as far as I’m aware
I guess there was some sort of issue
that caused damage to my interstitial tissue
It’s kinda cool how you can change hue
Now you are yellow, first you were blue
When I poke you
it really fucking hurts

The Truth Is Already Known

As I drive home
a mantra to myself
I repeat, I repeat, I repeat
The Truth Is Already Known
It cannot be changed
It has already occurred
and done the damage
We will just have to manage
its consequences
It will be revealed to me
and deal with me
later
There is a terrifying void between
what I know
and have yet to know
The suspension
bridging the two
is what kills me
I can’t turn back
I must drive home
The Truth Is Already Known
there
I repeat, I repeat, I repeat

Now

The present day
is a gift
given to us
from the past
to make up for
previous trespasses
and to then pass on
to the future
as a surprise
unwrapped
then revealed
for the time being
at the present time

Steps

There’s a place I sit
at the top of the steps
where I listen intently
to all that is said
down below
She doesn’t know
I’m here
I hear
I tread carefully so I as to not awake
the floorboards that creak and give me away
And although I don’t understand
all that is meant
I have spent
many hours in this spot
Her voice drifts up in waves
and I can only catch some
of what is said
but it’s enough to know
that it’s about me
and I am scared to be
the cause of her need
to talk so quietly
I worry big
and curl up small
until I hear nothing at all
from my spot at the top of the steps

Jacaranda

A carpet of colour
covers the town
signalling spring’s slow segue into summer
Shrugging off winter’s muted tones
Squinting against the overexposed light
like a photo developed in the dark to reveal a saturation of life
Soon we’ll seek shade for our skin
while sunlight sprinkles down, leaving dappled patterns on exposed limbs
There’s a Monet in our midst called mother nature
and she paints for us the same picture each season
so we can reminisce on days spent
threading flower chains
underneath a canopy that sheds
dollops of paint like purple rain

Dented

There’s a burning sensation in your chest

You just had to bring up your heart again

didn’t you

And now mine’s in my throat

The doctor says he wants to test

yours

But we know it already has been

I say, it can’t hurt

You say, not now that it’s broken

In the silence, we both hear the beat being missed

Then you say, “well, not broken, just dented”

You just had to bring up your heart again

didn’t you

Happy birthing day haiku

Breathe, heave, breathe, heave, breathe
Sluuuurp pop! waaaaah!, place skin on skin
Happy birth day, Mum!

For The Win

I’m cutting my losses
into little tiny pieces
and what I’ve gained
now remains
left
over
and is now over
and done with
I’m cutting my losses
and counting my blessings
but the lessons I’ve learned
have yet to be turned into wisdom
Sometimes I lay them out
All those little tiny pieces
But each time I do, I’m missing another from before
It seems I need to cut some more
It’s better than having nothing at all
And yet there’s nothing to win
because I’m not keeping score
So I’ll cut my losses
and set them free
Toss them into the wind
My own celebratory confetti
I’m cutting my losses
loose

One’s Company

One’s company
and two’s a crowd
there’s safety in numbers
but you’re too proud
to impose on others
so you sit alone
in a cookie cutter room
with nothing but the drone
of the news on loop
and the conditioned air
for comfort and companionship
You’re suddenly aware
that this may be
the way it is for you
forever and forever
And then a text comes though
“How u doin’?" she asks
You pause before you reply
You think about faking
and telling a lie
You think about saying
all is well, all is great
“Having a real fun time!”
But it’s too late
You’re telling her how
you’re not clear any more
“What am I doing?” you ask
You’re so scared and unsure
One’s company, you realise
is just too, too much
but you try to find a way
to live without another’s touch
She sends back support
As much as she can
You keep a copy
to have it on hand
You refer to it repeatedly
It means more than she’ll know
“I hope the cry helped
You are the business xo”